Go on and get off the Internet. It's been hollowed out by marauders and thieves. There's nothing for you there (here) anymore. I hope you read this and shut down all your profiles. Come back into the real world which feels more intimate, more dear now than it ever has. Stop disappearing into pixels. Stand on your feet and feel the earth beneath you. Your head has not been clear in years, but it could be. 

I listened to Serge Gainsbourg on the way into work this morning and had a revelation.  All of the men I loved in my teens and 20s because I thought they were so deep and complex were actually over-sexed, narcissistic, mostly talentless buffoons.  That goes for you too, Serge.  What an enormous load of shit. 

 I've had this creeping despair for a long time about art/creativity.  I've been thinking it might not be worth it--all these swirling voices on the Internet lead to fatigue, like what's the use in adding my own bullshit to this stupid soup?  But, maybe it's not really like that. 

I was introduced recently to the idea that maybe consciousness is fundamental.  In the universe, I mean.  Like instead of matter, maybe the universe is composed of information--thought, essentially.  The non-physical.  That's what underpins everything and gives rise to everything.  

So I was thinking--you know, the universe starts out and it's this system containing maximum entropy--chaos--and information is broken down into its smallest bits possible and it's just swirling around.  Well, maybe the process of evolution--progress--is the process by which we reduce entropy and create order.  Evolution creates order by shaping and differentiating organisms to live in different environments.  Now we've evolved with these giant brains, maybe its our responsibility to continue shaping information into larger packets.  Like---taking disparate bits from here and there and putting them together to make art, or do we have to call it art (?)--just things.

The idea is inspiring to me and along with Blavatsky's over-arching visions of the cyclical universe--the universe creating itself and dissolving again and again over gazillions of years--like maybe this is the way.  From entropy to order, higher and higher levels of order and someday we get to this blissful level of everything it its place and then it all falls apart again and we have to start over.  But all this to say, maybe making art is a sacred obligation.